A positive counseling outcome is often linked to one’s attitude. For it is attitude that is often behind the core issues that cause the need for counseling and it is attitude that will determine if a positive result comes from the therapeutic experience.

The key to having a good attitude is an understanding that attitude is NOT an emotion. Emotion is based on feelings. These feelings can be positive or negative, but they must not be the reason for one’s attitude. Attitude is based on thoughts. Thoughts give direction and control. Therefore, our state of mind is extremely important in shaping our attitude.

Biblical understanding that attitude is based on our thought process and not our emotion is found in Philippians 2:5 which in the NIV states:

“Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus”

The translation of the word attitude in the King James version is “mind” and in Greek it is “phroneō.”  The definition from Strong’s is “to have understanding, to think or to direct one’s mind to a thing.” Therefore, it can be reasonably deduced that control of our attitude is found in the mind or thought process and not in emotions that come from how we feel.

The analogy I often use to describe the attitude/emotion dichotomy is that of a locomotive. If we consider ourselves to be a train then our attitude is in the mind and our thinking is the engine of the train. Our emotions are the caboose of the train. These emotions can be good or bad but they are always found at the rear of the train.

Too often, I find individuals that base their attitude on how they feel. If they are feeling happy or have joy in their life their attitude is positive. If they are sad or angry than their attitude is negative. The problem is that this falsely absolves the need for responsibility of one’s attitude. In our Christian walk, Christ-like attitude cannot be based on how one feels at any given point in time. Christ-like attitude is based on obedience and that can only be achieved with a certain mind-set.

Getting back to the therapeutic experience, as a Spirit-filled Christian we must always create an attitude based on becoming Christ-like. This type of attitude is driven by a desire to be obedient to God’s Word even when life circumstances create a negative emotional state that doesn’t motivate obedience to God’s commandments.

Something to think about on our journey to Heaven.

Dr. Rob

“Pride goes before destruction, And a haughty spirit before a fall.”

                                                                                                                Proverbs 16:18

 One of the core issues that keep individuals from making healthy changes in their lifestyle and relationships is pride. Pride is one of those major issues that is often hard to see in yourself and even harder to accept. For some time, I have been using a bookmark titled Brokenness: The Heart God Revives, from Nancy De Moss’s Revive Our Hearts ministry, to help me identify issues of pride in my own life.  It helps me identify potential areas of pride and gives me a better understanding of what God’s true call for brokenness could look like.

  I often give these bookmarks out to individuals as a way to help them differentiate between a proud person and one who is broken.  This bookmark has proved a valuable resource, not only for me, but for others as well, in helping identify areas of pride that need to be brought before the Lord.  With brokenness, genuine humility becomes the prevailing attitude and the forgiveness process can begin bringing about real change through the Holy Spirit. 

 The bookmarks can be found at www.reviveourhearts.com.

 Something to think about on our journey to Heaven.

 Be Blessed,

Dr. Rob

It has always been a concern of mine to hear the stories of people who have been hurt by fellow Christians. The question often raised is, “Why are Christian’s so hypocritical?”  In the past, my answers have focused on the sinful nature that we all struggle with on a daily basis. While this answer is biblically correct it often provides little comfort.

Recently, I came across a research article by the Center for Bible Engagement, Back to the Bible (www.centerforbibleengagement.org) called “power of 4.” The research looks at behavioral differences between Christians who are engaged in Scripture at least four days a week and those who are not.  Based on the research the following behaviors were found to decrease:

• Smoking by 36%
• Getting drunk by 57%
• Sex outside marriage by 68%
• Pornography by 61%
• Gambling by 74%

These behaviors were found to increase:

• Sharing faith with others by 228%
• Disciple others by 231%
• Memorizing Scripture by 407%

The importance of being in God’s word is central to overcoming negative life circumstances and is essential to helping maintain emotional health. The authors of this study concluded that “Reading or listening to the Bible at least four days a week provides a measure of protection against the temptation of risky behaviors, beyond religious preference, church attendance, prayer or other spiritual disciplines.”

Positive behavior traits require accountability. Accountability comes out of relationships. Our relationship with God is established by spending time in His word. It light of this, I think a strong case can be made about how important the “power of 4” is in combating potential hypocrisy in the lives of Christians.

Something to think about on our journey towards heaven.

Dr. Rob

The use of our God given talent is of interest to me. I have always been fascinated by how Christians developed their talent. More specifically, I am in interested in how these individuals have pursued excellence. I recently re-read both parables of the talents found in Matthew 25:14-30 and Luke 19:12-28. In each of these passages, it seems to indicate that God has entrusted certain assets to all men and they will be held accountable to God for how they have used them. The question I have is, “If God entrusted us with certain assets, what is our obligation to Him in regard to the amount of effort it takes to achieve God’s intended results?”

I am intrigued about this subject because there seems to be a pervasive idea in the Christian community that any pursuit of personal goals leads to accusations of self centeredness or claims of a works based mentality.  Looking at each of these parables it brings forth many different thoughts, but one thought that comes to mind is that God definitely expects each and everyone one of us to cultivate the assets that He entrusted to each of us.

Awhile back, I finished Malcolm Gladwell’s, “Outliers: The Story of Success” (Little, Brown & Co., 2008). I enjoyed his thought provoking ideas and found myself intrigued with his finding that it takes “10,000 hours” to attain true expertise.

A summary of the argument in Outliers is as follows:

• There are no “naturally gifted” individuals emerging into superstars.
• There is a direct statistical relationship between hours of practice and achievement.
• There are no shortcuts.
• The number of hours to obtain excellence is at a minimum considered to be 10,000.

Gladwell quotes neurologist Daniel Levitin as follows:

“In study after study, of composers, basketball players, fiction writers, ice-skaters, concert pianists, chess players, master criminals, this number comes up again and again. Ten thousand hours is equivalent to roughly three hours a day, or 20 hours a week, of practice over 10 years… No one has yet found a case in which true world-class expertise was accomplished in less time. It seems that it takes the brain this long to assimilate all that it needs to know to achieve true mastery.”

While reading Gladwell’s book the question that kept coming to mind was, “Does the 10,000 rule hold true for Christians?”

Now before you write to tell me how there is no biblical basis for “10,000 hours” in the Bible, let me say, I agree with you! However, let me continue the thought for a little while longer.

If God’s calls us into stewardship, and one “worldly research” standard used to explain achievement or expertise is “10,000 hours” than how does this concept apply to Christians.

Giftedness appears to be individual specific and each of the parables definitely seems to suggest the need to cultivate (i.e. practice) our giftedness in a way that develops expertise. Therefore, let’s look to see how we can apply the “10,000 rule” to both you and me. Scripture clearly calls each of us into Christ-like excellence. Obtaining this excellence is multi-faceted, but at its core I believe we can all agree that God calls us to the pursuit of studying scripture and making it applicable to our lives. Therefore, if we do some quick math applied to the study of God’s word and we utilize the “10,000 rule” we would need the following time commitment:

• One hour a day for seven days a week than we need approximately 27 years to obtain true expertise.
• If we reduce our study time to a mere three hours a week, we need a little more than 64 years!

Reviewing these numbers, I immediately realize I have some work to do!

How about you?

In closing, I would not rigidly utilize the “10,000 rule” as a basis for obtaining Christ-like character. I would, however, emphasize that cultivation takes both time and effort in helping us grow those assets that God has entrusted to each of us. It also puts us in a position to be commended by our Master as being both “good” and “faithful” as seen at the end of the parables.

Something to think about on our journey towards heaven.

Be blessed,

Dr. Rob

“In his kindness God called you to his eternal glory by means of Jesus Christ. After you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and will place you on a firm foundation.” – I Peter 5:10

A few people over the past year have asked how we found our theme verse for Pathos. They also wanted to know some of the key applicable components of the verse as it related to counseling. After giving this some thought, I have decided to use this section of the web site to highlight the verse. My hope is that it provides some meaningful application as we are all attempting to deepen our relationship with the Lord.

It is interesting to me that at the beginning of this verse, Peter makes the point that God called, “…God called you…” Peter indeed would have firsthand knowledge of such an experience as his own relationship with Jesus was book end by personal callings from the Lord. These two callings were essential in Peter’s development as a leader who was ultimately called to expand God’s kingdom.

How about you? Are you working toward a deeper understanding of your identity and obedience? I have learned to appreciate Peter’s example in not only the words that he speaks, but the life changing behavior he demonstrates. Peter’s letters (I and II Peter) were written toward the end of his life where we can see his trials and witness God’s faithfulness in his life.

Blessings…….
Dr. Rob